the why / never answer ed / / /

---

& sick ness / goes in to me a gain

fuck / i can't stand this / / own worst
enemy / & last night drink ing / smoking
a million million cigarettes / & to day


not good / / / /


& i plan my escape
st.ill all most 3 weeks a way


& i can't stand the sound of cars
revving their engines


&

he asks me if going to come home
if i go for 3 weeks / / i laugh / tell him
i might not ///




& i try to re main strong / know that what
starts / has to / end



& last night a drunk in the bar
de clare his love for me / tells me
i'm the most beautiful woman



i don't feel beautiful / any more

just worn out / tired / / my skin
thinning / i don't like it




i de cide . it's the cigarettes




but i keep smoke ing






& now i'm count ing days a gain
& st.ill wonder ing what you thot
of all the words /

& i am / oh yes / all ways mountains
out of no thing

& now / i'm count ing a gain
wish ing summer to pass / to pass
in to / september / / & i wonder
how sad i'll be in october / / /









how my / mind creeps up
makes me para noid / don't trust
my self any more / not good enough
or some thing like that





& blood drops from my body

night creeps up / cold / my body
is cold / & re fuse to give in
to actual lee look ing after my self


& wonder / do i real lee have a death wish

i must / i think / & i draw in deep











/