& after open stage where the audience loves her

& so the night rolls in late again

& my eyes are tired
& my body is tired

but the mind

goes & goes





this is the temple of sickness
my own creation of pain




bow down to illness / the body
that can't rest / searches for sleep















where did comfort go / when did the dark mind show
some where between the harvest moon & the cold blue moon
of wynter / / ah bow down to the death earth



some where she sweats / casts off the snow & ice
turns to the sun / & smiles







some where the sky is pure blue
& all that glitters is snow




some where between the loads of laundry
the crumbs on the floor / she lost her mind













for got what she was saying / for got
just for got



a desperation / / a quiet desperation
some how just not hidden enough / hide it
for all the world to see /













the pain is all true tho / the body aches
the pain stabs through my asshole / that muscle
private place / belly hurts/ a numbness rides the thigh
stabbing . a knife . right through me .








but it's the swollen face in the morning that stares
back at me / what is that / / skin becomes softer / thinner
god i hate this body / /
wrinkles @ the slightest provocation / / face grows older