blotto - the journals of steve jones -- mind less

& so this mind waves

drunk

so hard to think to remember what it is
what it was i wanted to say


was fine up until the grass . . .

then - what can one say?


not much i suppose


the year comes to an end
complete with devastation of human kind

is this some kind of message
no - i suppose not - but the message goes in & out

my house is a glow with strings of christmas lights
gay - the lights / happy / decided lee / /
warm winter darkness

i 've decided / i use too many words


it's time to get to the core of the matter


the core of this earth's matter

one million atom bombs / rocked the earth

earth quake

plates slip sliding up against under / over
a massive amount of matter moving / / did the day
really get darker? // yes / i think it did



coincidence becomes more than a thing to question

what is this reality? who do you call toward you?



hmmm / & i wonder @ the questioning /
who do i / call toward me? / who's name do i speak



good god / could question ing like that be the reason for
organized religion / the call of jesus /??

oh who knows i don't even know what i'm thinking right now
the head spins awhirl with hash joint on top of 5 tequila
didn't feel drunk until the drugs / / holy



holy



in credible the thickness of the head / the buzz / wishing to pass out
ears whistle / hands a twitch / yet some how the hands the fingers still
manage to remember the key strokes / / ah i know there's a

warm flow of blood to the brain / the whitening / can't see any more's





the trick is

don't stand up

st.ill crave a cigarette / the impulse may be too much to



resist.




& some how my reality doesn't even shrug in horror
@ all those bodies / unimaginable / even the pictures
fail to shock me / / i don't know the dead / mass death
of horrific proportions / / doesn't




i died several times in pass lives giving birth
that's why i can't have children /
that's why i love women / i care take men / /

+ i was raised catholic / / poor girl i think
no wonder you're a dyke


\ i would love you too i think
squeezing her thin body in a hug /


2 21 am







steve jones is signing off / she can't get a crowd any more
her beauty fails in the face of humour / / lol